Frontline Coaching - Imposter Syndrome

Summary.  There is a large body of work on Imposter Syndrome, the accepted wisdom being that the term accurately captures a variety of professional performance-related angst around belonging.  When an idea becomes a useful buzz phrase, it can be easy to gloss over its substance.  An experience with a client made me think that perhaps it has allowed some professionals to miss the mark on interrogating the root causes of their Imposter Syndrome, or even if that is what is actually at play.

            I bumped heads with the renowned Imposter Syndrome quite early in a coaching engagement with a new client who, in a coveted new role, wanted to be more comfortable in his working skin and communicate effectively to be heard.

         Two sessions in,  when discussing a challenging work situation that the client successfully handled, I sensed heavy energy around my client; a third party perched on his shoulder.  As it was in the room during our coaching session, so it might very well be with him on other occasions.   I imagined my client ready to open a door to a deftly prepared meeting with that energy dampening his confidence, a constant, shadowy presence.  

         My client facilitated the direction of the exploration of this energy by stating that he had Imposter Syndrome.  I shared my sense that he had personified Imposter Syndrome.   They formed a  dystopian couple.  We explored whether the client carried this with him when least helpful, for example, to work meetings or presentations.   

         Describing an almost out-of-body experience, the client said that when he sees his accomplished CV or when colleagues favourably talk about him, he feels that he is not the person they are talking about.  A top performer and habitually over-prepared, he was also concerned that his boss thought he already knew how to deliver on all assignments, when in fact he would have liked more guidance.

         Following our session, I read more about Imposter Syndrome in respected business journals, peer content, listened to professional (mostly women) forums on the topic, and remained unsettled about how to assist with loosening the grip this notion had on my client.  Slightly exasperated, I turned to my reliable foundation for making sense - the words themselves.   Accuracy of language, the gravitas of what the words mean, proved apt in this situation.

         Penguin Complete English Dictionary, my favourite, defines impostor or imposter as “a person who assumes a false identity or title for fraudulent purposes.”

         This made me want to question my client to understand how he valued his life experience.  In our next coaching session, I read through his  CV and began to ask questions, such as, 

         “Did you not attend this university?”  

         “Were you not the star prosecutor?” 

And so on, but not for too long.   

         He responded to my questions with a vigorous defence of the veracity of his biographical details.  Of course, the schools and accomplishments were all accurate.  He owned the hard work that his CV represented.  He was not someone pretending to be the person on the CV.  Those were his skills, sweat, and successes chronicled to open the doors he wanted to open.  We explored the negative association of “imposter” to and beyond the self, and to the wider world.   Stand before a mirror, look yourself in the eye, and say imposter.  It won’t leave you unaffected.   Imposter Syndrome deflates hard work, experience, and earned opportunities.   I saw my client, brilliant yet thus deflated.

         In favour of accuracy, we began a discussion to choose the language to justly replace Imposter Syndrome.  That language is distinct to each person.  

         I wanted my client’s indignation at my questioning his credentials to replace his Imposter Syndrome.  We began to constructively reframe his narrative.

         The questions that followed allowed the client in this case to uncover the extent to which, and when, Imposter Syndrome hovered.  I asked the client if he could use any phrase or expression other than “Imposter Syndrome” to describe it, what would it be? Recalling his military training, he chose to use the idea of “stretch” in its fullest grammatical sense to fill the Imposter Syndrome space.

         Imposter Syndrome for this client unfolded as insecurity about mastering new knowledge and environments, being challenged, and about fully deserving to occupy his space.  Stretching.  Whether the stretch felt good or bad in the future, the client was resolved to keep the right frame of reference when challenged.  He is that capable professional opening that door with the sum of his experiences, and more, at his beck and call.  

         A large part of my process around Imposter Syndrome involves helping the client take back control of their narrative, even if painful.  By tying ambitions back to realities around examples of challenges in life, and deeply interrogating mindset, we can begin to deconstruct fears.  And, the feelings and evidence on which those fears are based.

            You are not an imposition.  Ingrain an image of a poster of you as your best self and deconstruct imposter into your “I M Poster”.

            It’s not gender-specific.

         Happy International Women’s Day.

Some facts and details have been modified to protect client privacy.